Posts
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Set and Setting: social, first Russia
‘They’ say we are social beings, maybe on a spectrum from extrovert to ambivert to otravert to introvert to …, BUT most of us do seem to want people in our lives.[i] Being part of a group, with family ties and community provides protection, access to resources, and opportunities for cooperation. For the individual in the…
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Set and Setting: culture, language, religion
If you had asked us point blank, we would have assured you that we were going to honour Yasik’s Russian heritage. I guess by going to Russian meet-ups and by eating piroshkies, but in reality – likely because we gave it no conscious thought to what retaining his Russian heritage might mean – we were…
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Set and Setting: Physical
In my mid-teens I was on a train coming from Edmonton and headed to my home in the Fraser Valley for the Christmas holidays. I’d fallen asleep and woke in the early morning as the train was pulling into the Blue River station which was right up against a mountain. That mountain assured me that…
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Set and Setting: Historical, Political, Economic
Parenting an Adopted Child reminds us “that children’s lives do not begin the day they are adopted. Regardless of the type of adoption, children have biological relatives and genetic histories of their own”[i]. When seeking to know an adoptee’s mindset it is likely in the best interests of adopters to acquaint themselves with anything available…
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Introduction to Set and Setting
Yasik was now a Canadian Vincent. It was time to move from his Russian nurture to his nurture in our family, not ignoring that he would be bringing his Russian-transferring-to-Canadian nature and nurture along. I heard Dr. Phil once say, in a context I may be misconstruing, that ‘it’ (life/relationships) is all about perspective or…
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Our Son is a Person
I know we tend to pickle memories in a brine that renders them more rosy-shaded than blood-red. Nonetheless my journal is a record of how I viewed my world at the time, a primary source with hopefully less cherry-picking than my mind might remember now. Still, reading those journal pages 25 years later, it seems…
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Stick to a Routine
Institutions of all sorts dress themselves in routines. It is certainly a given for orphanages whether George Mueller’s Ashley Down in 1849 or SOS Children’s Villages today. Routine at Ashley Down Orphanage 1849 – 1958.[i] Time Activity 6:00 AM Wake-up, washing, dressing, and chores (making beds and cleaning floors) 7:00 AM Morning preparatory work –…
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Forming a Family
Library shelves in the 21st century continually showcase new books being written about adoption scandals coming to light in countries from China to Canada to Argentina toBritain. Each speaks to horrors that make international protections of vulnerable children understandable. In 1997 we could not have imagined following the dots from the need for such protective…
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Émigré to Immigrant
Checklist: get landed Taking Yasik through immigration, Dave was asked, “Is your wife landed?” Dave assured him, “Yes, yes, she is just over there, waiting by the luggage”. The customs officer tried again, “No, is she landed?” And Dave proudly repeated, “Yes, we both went to get our son and she is waiting by the…
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Introductions
And then it was time to take one last trip through Moscow in the middle of the night, arriving at the airport when a full moon was filling the waiting room. The airplane offered even more technical curiosities for Yasik. We caught the wonder of earphones in the picture included here. While waiting in Frankfurt…